# 🐀 REVIEW: Wix Show & Tell Copy v3 — Authenticity Filter **Verdict: REVISE 🔄** The bones are good. The brief was right — first person, specific, no taglines. v3 mostly follows it. But the agency keeps leaking through in the details. Every section has at least one sentence where the voice shifts from "founder explaining his work" to "copywriter describing a capability." A real person doesn't itemize deliverables. They tell you what they did and what happened. --- ## What's Working - **HERO is strong.** "I spent twenty years running creative departments. This is what the system produces." — Blunt, earns its confidence, sounds like a person. Don't touch it. - **STORY paragraph, first three sentences.** Paris, then New York. Talent was expensive. Built playbooks. Taught them to AI. This is how a founder actually tells their origin story — cause and effect, not mythology. - **"Three weeks start to finish."** This is the kind of thing a founder drops to flex. It works because the preceding sentences earned it. - **"Not a slide deck that goes in a drawer."** Has actual personality. A founder says this because they've seen it happen. Keep it. - **eToro caption opener.** "eToro needed a clear picture of where they stood." Simple, clear, sets up the problem. Real. --- ## Flagged Sentences ### STORY **"The system runs those methods now, across every project."** → "Across every project" is scope language. It's what you put in a proposal to justify pricing. A founder at a conference would just stop earlier or be less sweeping. → **Rewrite:** "The system runs those methods now." --- ### BRANDING **Line: "Named, positioned, and designed a deeptech food startup — blank page to brand book."** → "Named, positioned, and designed" is a three-verb agency stack. Nobody talks like this. "Blank page to brand book" is a copywriter's catchphrase — it's catchy, which is exactly the problem. This is supposed to sound like Assaf, not like his agency's website. → **Rewrite:** "Built the entire brand for a food-tech startup. They had nothing — we gave them everything." **Caption: "...built the logo, color system, and typography, wrote the brand voice and positioning line, and delivered a complete brand book."** → This is a scope of work masquerading as a story. You can hear the line items. A founder doesn't inventory deliverables — they describe the outcome. → **Rewrite:** "...built the whole visual system and brand voice, packaged it into a brand book." --- ### ASSET CREATION **Line: "A tool that takes a startup brief and returns production-ready branded assets."** → "Production-ready branded assets" is the single most agency phrase in this entire document. Nobody outside of a creative department says "production-ready branded assets." This is a product description, not a person talking. → **Rewrite:** "A tool that takes a brief and gives you finished creative you can actually use." **Caption: "...each needing branded assets — copy, visual direction, file-ready formats — fast."** → "Branded assets" again. "File-ready formats" is procurement language. → **Rewrite:** "...each needing creative — copy, visuals, files they can actually print and post — fast." **Caption: "...the tool produces on-brand creative..."** → "On-brand creative" is what account managers say in status meetings. A founder says "creative that matches their brand" or just "the right stuff." → **Rewrite:** "...the tool produces the creative..." --- ### RESEARCH & INTELLIGENCE **Line: "17 competitors. Each mapped at brand level — identity, positioning, channels."** → "Mapped at brand level" is consultant-speak. A founder would describe what they actually looked at, not categorize the methodology. → **Rewrite:** "17 competitors. How they look, what they say, where they show up." **Caption: "...visual identity, positioning logic, channel behavior, messaging tone."** → Four jargon nouns in a row. This is a framework label list, not speech. A smart audience gets it if you say it plainly. → **Rewrite:** "...how they look, how they position themselves, where they show up, and what they sound like." **Caption: "Delivered as an interactive database they could filter and reference"** → "Filter and reference" is mild but slightly formal. The sentence works better if it sounds like a feature someone would brag about, not describe in a spec. → **Rewrite:** "Delivered as a live database they can actually search and use" --- ### TEAM **"Eight AI agents handle copywriting, visual direction, art direction, research, engineering, project management, quality control, and orchestration."** → This is a capabilities list from a pitch deck. Eight functions listed like a services menu. A founder introducing their team at a conference wouldn't enumerate every agent's job title. They'd say something that lands. → **Rewrite:** "Eight AI agents handle everything else." Or if specificity matters: "Eight AI agents — they write, design, research, build, and keep each other honest." --- ## Pattern Note The problem is consistent: **every time the copy needs to describe scope or deliverables, it reverts to agency inventory language.** The story sections are human. The description sections are deck copy. The fix isn't word-level — it's recognizing that a founder describes *what happened* and *what it did*, not *what was delivered*. Deliverable lists belong in SOWs. This is a stage, not a spreadsheet. --- **Bottom line:** The voice is 70% there. The structure is right, the stories are real, the specificity is genuine. But the agency reflex — stacking deliverables, using category labels instead of plain speech — still breaks the illusion in every section. One more pass with this filter and it ships. *Anton — 2026-03-23*